Dynamic Discipleship III, Forces That Hinder True Discipleship

In the end, he makes those decisions. And that's what happened tonight, and kind of the way it all happened. All right, are we ready to have a little teaching tonight? How about a lot of teaching? I only got about 30 minutes left, but we're going to do it. Are you cool enough? Are you too cool? Are you a little warm? See that? No. Well, I had seven yeses and six noes. If I see one more fan going up, I'm turning the air conditioner down. All right, I think it's bearable. It's probably cooler on the sides if you're really hot in the center, but anyway. God help us. We'll never get it exactly right, so I know that's going to be the case. All right, you should all have blue sheets now, and we've done these announcements. Turn to 1 Thessalonians tonight. When's the last time you turned there? You've got to be fresh water and put the bug back in. All right. It's good protein, that's right. All right. Are you there? 1 Thessalonians. Paul, Silas, and Timothy, to the church of the Thessalonians, and God the Father, and the Lord Jesus Christ, grace and peace to you. We always thank God for all of you, mentioning you in our prayers. We continually remember you before our God and Father, your work produced by faith, your labor prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ. For we know, brothers, loved by God, that He has chosen you. Talked about that last week, you're chosen. This gospel came to you, not simply with words, but also with power, with the Holy Spirit and with deep conviction. You know how we lived among you for your sake. You became imitators of us and of the Lord. In spite of severe suffering, you welcomed the message with joy, given by the Holy Spirit, and so you became a model to all the believers in Macedonia and Achaia. The Lord's message rang out from you, not only in Macedonia and Achaia, your faith in God has become known everywhere. Therefore, we do not need to say anything about it, for they themselves report what kind of reception you gave us. They tell how you turned to God from idols to serve the living and true God, and to wait for His Son from Heaven, whom He raised from the dead, Jesus, who rescues us from the coming wrath. Some years ago, Carol and I were to meet a friend and his family at their home in Baltimore to share an evening of fellowship. Just brought up to date once again. We had been students together in seminary, hadn't seen each other for a while. Got to Baltimore fine, but really couldn't find our way around too well. The directions I jotted down were not clear, and I was really pretty much lost. I stopped a couple of places. I said, could you tell me how to get, I can't remember the name of the street, I think it was Franklin Road or something like that. You know, I never stop at a place and ask for directions, and one guy says, well, it's three rights and a left. And he looks at Max, and Max says, no, it's two lefts and a right. And then Max looks at Joe, and Joe says, no, it's three more blocks down that way, and you know that they don't know where they're sending you. Well, that's the way it was becoming. I drove around a little longer, got frustrated and hungrier, and finally I humbled myself, called my friend. And he proceeded on the phone to tell me, you know, all these things that go through this intersection and this Y, don't take the Y to the right, but take it to the left, and then there's the five points, and don't go here. I said, wait a minute. He said, I hear you, I'll be there. So seven or eight minutes later he arrived at the gas station where we were calling, and he said, two words, follow me. Now, tonight's message is those two words. I felt kind of like we were overwhelmed last week with stuff, so I reduced it down to two words tonight that every one of us will remember. Let's say it. Follow me. The essence of discipleship is those two words. Follow me. Follow me. Jesus himself used those words 13 times in the Gospels, and he said them a whole lot more times in other contexts. And we're going to look tonight at what that means literally. What does it mean to follow me when Jesus speaks those words? He said it to Peter and Andrew, two little fishermen, wild men probably. Follow me, and they did it. To James and John, called the sons of thunder. Why? They were fired up. They were radicals. Follow me, he said, to a tax collector, a yuppie, businessman. Follow me. And they did it. You know, I reflected over the last nearly 25 years of my life since I became a really committed believer in Christ. I have to tell you something. You know, when you take those moments and pause and just reflect a bit, you know, from 66 to 68, someone said to me, You follow me. And I did. And they taught me an awful lot about what it meant to know Christ. 1969 and 70, I said to a group of high school kids in Lexington, Virginia, You follow me. And they did. And God did some wonderful things. 1971 to 74, in seminary, I had a few choice brethren, and the leader of a large ministry in a local church in Pasadena, California, say, Follow me. And I did. And I grew an awful lot in my understanding of discipleship. And I was growing. In 1974, I pulled out this file of notes. And, you know, I led a retreat of elders of a Presbyterian church in another side of the city, Beulah Presbyterian Church. They had me do a retreat about discipleship in 1974. They were men of faith. I'll tell you what. I mean, I don't know much now, and I sure didn't know a whole lot then. But I've discovered something. Our whole life in Christ is really a working out of those two words. It is not when you come to Christ, you know, the end of it all. Well, you know, you've finally nailed it down. It's the beginning of following him. Follow me, Jesus said. Discipleship can be filled with buzzwords and jargon and formulas and lists. And I'm a little concerned tonight that some of us are burned out from all that. And so I'm going to try to stay away from some of that because we don't need to complicate it. Jesus just said it nice and plain and simple. What did he say? Follow me. Now, if Jesus Christ were to appear today and say that to you, Jim, or Dennis, or Rich, or Jim, or anyone else, what are the odds that you'd say anywhere, any place, anything? Pretty significant. The problem is when another person does it, what do you see in that person along with the character of Christ? What else do you see? Yeah, you see the faults, and you know what lurks in there, and you're wondering, well, what kind of a trip is this person on? And all those kinds of negative things. A recent journal that I get as a pastor, Ministries Today, it's called. Right on the cover, it's a black cover. That's symbolic. And here's the quote, centerpiece of the cover. It says, discipleship was wrong. I repent. I ask forgiveness. Signed by Bob Mumford. And in the article, he explains how the involvement, you know, of the Mobile Five back in the 70s, and some of you were all a product of that, got people off on some tangents about discipleship. Now, what he means there is the brand of discipleship they had was wrong. Discipleship is not wrong. But authoritarian, kind of manipulating, personal authority over your life kinds of things, I tell you what car to drive and what person to marry, that kind of thing is wrong. But the kind of thing that draws you nearer to Jesus and helps you to get in touch with the power of God in your life and to grow in character and release of the Spirit, that kind of discipleship is never more needed than it is today. And I'll tell you what I'm excited about tonight because I believe we're going to nail something down tonight in our church life that has to be there. You know, disciples, basically, making disciples is simply being with people. You don't make disciples any other way than being with people. And there's two corollaries to that. The more you're with people, the more discipleship happens with them. And number two, the more purposeful you are, the better off it's going to be. Now, I'd like to share with you today, this evening, just a few specific principles from the Scripture and then we're going to go down through this list. Let's first of all take your outline there. Number one, let's recognize the obvious, okay? Recognize the obvious. Jesus spoke the words 13 times. Discipleship was His method. The Apostle Paul, likewise, was unafraid to say, follow me as I follow Christ. Letter C, making disciples meant being with people. Folks, you don't make disciples by, you know, sending them tapes. You don't make disciples by, you know, just calling them up. You make disciples by being with people. And the two corollaries, the more you're with them, the more it happens in their life, the more purposeful you are, the better it's going to be. You see, the reason that is, is that discipleship is formation of character. It's not information. Discipleship is taught. It's not taught. You've got to be with people to understand what this is about. Discipleship is action, not belief. How many of you believe discipleship is right? Let me see your hands. How many of you believe that? How many of you are making disciples? It's not just what you believe, it's what you do in discipleship. Number four is possessing it, not just professing it. We can say it until we're blue in the face, but we've got to possess it. We've got to own it in our lives. We have to be doing it. Now, I want us to see something here in Thessalonians, in the Thessalonian church. Here's why I had you read this. Notice the example here. Look at the beginning of verse five. The gospel came to you not simply with words, but also with power, with the Holy Spirit, and with deep conviction. To you, does that sound like a revival? I mean, if the Holy Spirit comes in, power, and deep conviction, and evidences. I mean, how many of you know that's what we're praying for around here? Are you praying for that? We were with a group of pastors. I know I mentioned this last once. I want to mention it again. In anticipation of the visit of Reinhard Bonnke, the German evangelist, who has a ministry all over Africa. And his ministry, everywhere he goes, is attended with signs and wonders. And he'll tell you, my main ministry is evangelism, but the Lord attends it with signs and wonders. And the room is just filling with anticipation, because they want to see a revival in Pittsburgh. We pray for it here. I want to see it right here. If there's a revival in Pittsburgh, I guarantee it's not going to miss this place. Lord, I believe that. I mean, I trust it. If it does, I'm out of town. Okay, I'm out of here. But we're all praying for it. That's our message. The message is the gospel message in the power of the Holy Spirit. That's our message. But I wish I could come and just put my hand on your shoulder and impress you with this, okay? Letter E. Discipleship has two parts. There's a message, but folks, look at the next part of verse 5. You know how we lived among you. You see, discipleship is also a method. The biggest problem I see in the church today is we're real hot on the message. We're not very warm at all on the method. Should I come out and put my hand on your shoulder and tell you that? Do you feel what I'm saying? Put your hand on someone's shoulder. We're already going out. There's no visitors tonight. I'm going to go, all right? It's a message and a method. You can put your hand down. Some of you are enjoying that too much. Put your hand down now. A couple of guys are saying, I was waiting for the pastor to do that for six years. You see, it's a method, folks. Who thought the method first? Who initiated the method? Jesus. What did he say? What are the two words? Follow me. Now, here's Paul saying, we came and we preached an incredible message, a message of power with the Holy Spirit and with deep conviction. That's every preacher's dream right there. And then he says, look at it again. I'm not making it up. You know how we lived among you. For whose sake? For their sake, he says. It's a methodology that requires you to be with them. Look further on down in chapter, we won't read on down, but look down to verse 8. Or let's start at verse 7, 2-7. As apostles of Christ, we could have been a burden to you, but we were gentle among you, like a mother caring for her little children. The word there literally is the nursing mother image. We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God, but our lives as well, because you become so dear to us. Surely you remember, brothers, our toil and hardship. We work night and day in order not to be a burden to anyone. Verse 11. For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children. You see the importance of the method. Being with people. By the way, look at verse 12. Encouraging, comforting, and urging you to live lives worthy of God. Now that's what a disciple does. Let's say those three words. Encouraging, comforting, and urging you to live lives worthy of God. The word encouraging is the word parakaleo in the Greek, which means parakaleo, called alongside. A discipler is called alongside of another person. That's how it happens. Now, the fact that being a growing Christian best happens in the context of discipleship should be no surprise, but it might be. It shouldn't be a surprise. You see, most everything that's worth learning in life is learned by being with someone who knows it. Isn't that right? My mom and dad are here tonight, and they've often told me this story of how when they were first married and I first came along, there was a dear woman who lived up above them in their first apartment house who taught my mom about cooking. How to put together a household and how to cook. Just how to do the stuff. We've been forever grateful for that. But she learned by watching. How many of you here ski? A lot of skiers here. What's the best way to learn to ski? Go with someone who knows what they're doing. And watch them and have them help you to do it. How about golfing? Or how about almost any sport? The best way to learn is to have someone... Why do we have coaches? Because they know how to do it and they take the time to come alongside you and show you how to do it. They literally instruct you along the way. I can't tell you how many times I've been in different garages and repair shops and I've asked the mechanics, where did you learn to do that? Did you go to school for that? Sometimes they say yes. You know what they usually say? They say, no, I was with my uncle or my friend and they taught me. And they've learned all this stuff just by being with someone who knew what they were doing. Folks, we learn that way. It applies in life, but Jesus put a whole new sling on it. He said, you just follow me and I'll teach you what it means to be a disciple. I'll teach you what it means to grow in Christ. Larry Tomczak, who is a friend of ours and I've had different occasions to speak with him, wrote this. He said, over the years, I have heard, brothers, that I was discipling unto Jesus comment that they learned more about praying, relating to their wives, healing the sick, training children, and evangelizing, for my personal example, than by my electrifying 12-week series on the subject. It's amazing what attitudes can surface in unguarded moments on a basketball court, in a couple's get-together. No, it's not the barbecued chicken. My wife and I are having a battle tonight. Or simply in a children's group activity at the end of a long day. These events are tailor-made for revealing the real person never seen on Sunday morning. You see, being with someone helps to shape who they're going to be in Christ. And this is the thing that's so lacking today. Now, folks, what are the obstacles? Turn your seat over. Removing the obstacles. Why don't we do this? All right, number one. Mainly, we don't do it because we've never experienced it. We've never experienced it. Quite likely, it's quite likely that the majority of us here have not ever had an individual come to us and say, follow me. Now, maybe you had a pastor or a teacher that you liked or maybe you had a friend that kind of helped you along. I just can't help but ask the question. How many of you can say in clear conscience with a clear knowledge of who it is I'm talking about, could say that some other Christian person more mature than you at some point came along, looked you in the eye and said, follow me. Let me see your hand. All right, thank you. How many would say that never really happened to you? You're just kind of here because of the way things have happened. Let me see your hand. Wave. All right, that's a two-thirds majority, maybe 75%. See, most of you have never experienced the follow me of the Gospels. You've never heard a person say it. You know, asking people to do something that they've never had done or participated in is quite difficult. If I were to ask you to go out and coach basketball and you've never played basketball, that'd be a little tough to do. If I were to ask you to go construct a house and you've never been taught how to hit a hammer and nail, it'd be kind of tough to do. To disciple someone having never experienced it is quite difficult to do. Now, when you're talking in spiritual terms, it's even more challenging, isn't it? Because you can tell if you're building a house or not, but sometimes you can't tell if a person's life is being built. It's a whole lot more ambiguous at times. And folks, I want you to know something. I don't know why, but I'll never forget the time all the way back 24 years ago when I was a college student. This young guy looked at me and he said, I'll teach you how to follow Christ. I wasn't sure I wanted that or not. I was a college student who was kind of like, I want to still be cool and stuff. Can I still be cool and follow Christ? Probably not. I've told you this story enough times. It was a real change in my life. But he stuck with me for the next three years and then he kind of transferred me over to some heavy hitters. He said, this guy's really got problems. No, I'm just kidding. But over the space of those next years, I knew what it was. I mean, it was ingrained in who I was to be a disciple. And to be a disciple. The second reason why we don't, the second obstacle is, we feel inadequate. How many people would raise their hand and say, that's me. I don't feel adequate to do this. Let me talk about this for a second. First of all, we feel inadequate because we're not sure what to do. And then, we're not sure who we should do it with. And we say, who's more mature than me or less than mature? It's kind of like, that's a very fine line there. You feel kind of presumptuous if you go up to a person who's less mature, at least you think they're less mature in Christ, and you say, gee, I'm thinking about getting together with some folks and I wondered if you'd like to have me disciple you. And they say, you know, they give you some choice comments, like, you think you're more mature than me and we have this big spiritual battle going on here. Loser, what are you doing here? But then, if you go to someone who's way more mature, then you feel intimidated and that doesn't seem to work. So there's some real tender decisions there. And even when we find people that maybe it works with, we're still not sure what to do. Well, you don't just sit there and rub. You know, it's not imparted that way. What do you do? And lots of us, lots of people have told me in times past, they said, Jay, I want to, but I don't know what to, or who to with, or when to. That's a problem, isn't it? I mean, I was meeting with a group right now, 6.15 on a Thursday morning, the only time they had. I know others who've met nine o'clock at night when everyone else is getting ready to go to bed, they're getting together because they just want to be together. Making it work. Number four, the fourth obstacle, we're impatient. We want this stuff to bear fruit now. You know, we're, to think that it might take six months to see some progress, some real change, or longer. How long did Jesus spend with his? Three years. I don't think they were sanctified by the end of six months. I was reading one book this week in preparation. A pastor of a church, he's turned his whole church over to what he calls a disciple-making church. He said, he's committed himself to five years before he sees a substantial change. That's, I mean, he's putting it all on the line. That's big time. You know, but we are so programmed in America to get the results now. You know, we want the ultra-disciple fast program. You know? Quick Bible verse in the morning, another one for lunch, a balanced meal at the end, and we've got good disciples. It doesn't work that way. It doesn't work that way. It takes time. And I have to say to you, you know, it's sometimes discouraging it takes so long. And every once in a while, God will see, let you see a glimmer of hope, and sometimes even a great victory. And you'll see a young believer come on and, boom, go blasting right on by you. You know, just wait. Catch it. All right? So finally then, let's, number three, let's look at a strategy here. All right? Revealing a strategy. Let me just put some answers to all these questions and all these problems. When Jesus said, follow me, folks, I think implicitly you can't package that. All right? So throw away your discipleship manuals. Sorry. In deference to some of you who have a pile of them. I mean, they can be helpful, but that isn't, it doesn't tell you in there what to do when the person says, oh, I don't want to get together again. It doesn't tell you what to do when the person says, I've got this terrible depression coming. You know, you've just got to understand it's a process to work out. And it isn't necessarily an easy one. But here's some practical helps. Number one, identify the people that are potential disciples for you. Now, if you're thinking, and I know some of you are, well, I need to be discipled first. I'll answer that at the end. But identify the people that you might be able to disciple. I want to guarantee you something, folks. Here tonight, in this Wednesday night service, I guarantee you that there's at least two people, for every single one of you here tonight in our church, two people who come regularly to North Way, that you could disciple, who are not as mature as you are. That's how many people, at least right now, we have kind of roaming around out there. So don't, you know, as many problems as you have, my brother or sister, there are at least two people who have more. And they come to this church. That's a scary thought, but that's true. So identify the people. They may be a friend. It may be someone not even from the church. Maybe someone you work with that you're just spending some time with. It may be a neighbor, a relative. It may be someone that Pastor Scott assigns to you through the Harvest Ministry. Someone that says, well, I'm willing to be discipled. Send me somebody. You say, well, how do I know? Well, my thought to you tonight is this. Obviously, you don't go up and say to them, you know, in some kind of a smug way, look, brother, I've been noticing you need some growth in your life. I see some serious character flaws. I'm going to disciple you. Are you ready? That's likely to lead you down into some serious trouble, all right? Especially if it's someone the size of Mac, all right? So obviously, you have to approach this relationally. You need to get together with the person, sense their heart, and say, you know, I've been, and hopefully you won't even approach it unless you know them well enough to know that they probably would profit from some things that you've been growing in. This may be someone in your home group already if you're a home group leader or not. I mean, just, it could be anybody, but you know when someone's kind of, and let me say this, it can even be someone that you feel is kind of a peer, but the two of you together want to grow. I mean, you can almost follow one another if you know what I'm saying, as long as you define the relationship that way. Then once you identify the people, identify the flow. If you're going to have structured time, a lot of discipling just happens when you're together. It happens when you just go and do stuff together. You go out to a restaurant when you, you know, go and paint a garage door, whatever, just doing stuff sometimes imparts things, but here's what I would suggest. If you have a meeting time, one time a week, twice a week, here's what I would do. The four I's. I would share interests, what's been happening in my life this week? What things have been happening that are interesting and, you know, causing me some stress or causing me some joy? Share your interests. What's going on in your life? Number two, share input. Very important. Don't just talk. Get yourself some kind of input. We can give you a list of books, a book like Lead On, a book like, Terry used a book called The Fight, depending on the maturity level of the person. There's a lot of books we can recommend and will recommend to you. You can take the Growing In Christ booklet that we give to new believers and just work through that. Folks, it's a mistake to get together and not have an input. You say, well, can I just use the Bible? The answer is yes. Pick a book of the Bible and say, all right, we're going to study Thessalonians or we're going to study James or whatever. Just have an input. Don't just shoot out there because, you know what will happen in two or three weeks? You won't have a direction and you'll lose momentum and the persons or person will say, well, you know, we're just going to get together and share again. And you're not that interesting and, you know, I need input. It's true. Number three, investment. I find it's very important in a discipling relationship that each person is giving something to that relationship or outside of it. Talk about where you're, you know, who you're praying for outside of your group or outside of that relationship. What are you hoping God will do as you give something of your time, talent, or treasure? Give an investment. Why? Because it helps people to see that God's working in their life. And number four, intercession. I'd spend a little time of prayer. Doesn't have to be a long time of prayer. Some of our meetings, we pray for 15 minutes, sometimes for two or three minutes. It just depends on how much happened in between. Now, along the way, the Holy Spirit might change that some, you know, and He might just, you might have to throw out your investment portion and just minister to one another. Lots of things can happen but those four ingredients should be in all of your meetings together. And then finally, third practical thing, identify the parameters. Many discipling relationships fail because you just throw it all out there. Like, you know, you're two people sitting down to a 25-inch pizza. Ever do that? You know, you go out and you're hungry and you sit down and here's this gigantic pizza that's, you know, about that long and you think you're going to eat it but you don't and pretty soon you get sick of it. Here's what I suggest. Number one, decide up front how long you're going to meet. Two months? Ten weeks? Three months? And then say, that's it. At the end of ten weeks, three months, we're going to break this thing off. Now, what may happen is you'll have, some people say, hey, this has been so good, let's do it for another three months. You may have, you know, you may have it where it's like by the ninth week you're praying for the tenth to be there but that's okay. Set a defined time. Follow me for ten weeks. Follow me for three months. Follow me for whatever it is. I think it's very important. All right? Identify how often you're going to meet. Twice a week? Once a week? I wouldn't meet less than once a week. You might as well chuck it if you're going to be discipling somebody. Meet once a week. Call each other every day. Whatever. Something like that. And the third parameter of the definition where are we going to meet? Are we going to meet at Denny's? Are we going to meet at your house? At the church? At your workplace? Meet somewhere where you can be open and honest and share openly and minister to each other and talk. Now, I'm about finished. For some reason this all seems pragmatic and kind of like, well, here it is and I guess I can't help but say what's going to keep us, every one of us from doing this? What's going to keep us We'll find reasons to believe that this teaching was for the brother next to us. We'll think, well, I'm a mom. I have two or three kids. I don't have time. Yes, you do, moms. You have time to grow. You have time to say to someone, follow me, or to say to someone else, can I follow you? Here's the word. One word. Here's why we won't do it. Initiative. We won't take the initiative. We'll wait until someone sky writes it for us. Then we'll believe it's God. I want to have the answers right away. Please give you a closing response sheet. I purposely held this back until the end because I want you now to share with me what's on your heart in response to this message. I think it's very important we don't just say it's another teaching. Here's what I want you to do. Take the closing minutes. It'll take you about two because this is just a simple yes-no thing. Fill this out and honestly now say, Lord, here's where I am with this whole issue. Here's how I feel about it. Here's what I can do in response to what you're saying. I'll be quiet up here. If you have a question, you can raise your hand and I'll try to answer it for you. All right? If you should be overlooked, the ushers will come right back up and get you one. Some of you are studying. It's like a tax return. Hoping to find a loophole, but there isn't any, is there? Okay, just another moment and we need to prepare to dismiss tonight. If you need some more time and honestly, I could understand that because you want to give an honest answer. You don't have to fill it out right. I can wait until afterwards. But if you have finished it, I want you to pass it on across right into the center. The ushers will come down and pick them up. If not, at the end, you can put them in the box or the baskets and we'll get them. I'd like to get them from you. Very important in our planning for the future and what we're going to do. While some others are finishing up, why don't you go ahead and get your offering out for tonight if you're going to give. Let's do that too. We're still praying for our property release. If you didn't hear me say it over the weekend, what we're having to do is go door to door at Forest Oaks because of a... well, never mind. An unfortunate glitch in the way the deed was recorded in 1981 when they laid out the townhouse development. We have to get approval from the folks next door that they can release their little portion of the road that's up there. So it's happening. It just takes some time. We're praying for it to happen quickly though so we can press ahead. That's where it's at. That's why we haven't told you anything. We don't really know any more than that. Your prayers are much needed at this time. All right. I want you to stand together and I want us to read if Sam, please, and Mimi will put up this scripture, Luke 9, Mimi. These are Jesus' words and I felt them fitting as an ending tonight. Let's read them out loud and together, shall we? Then he said to them all, If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it. For whoever loses his life for me will save it. What good is it for a man to gain the whole world and yet lose or forfeit his very self? If anyone is ashamed of me in my words, the Son of Man will be ashamed of him when he comes in his glory and the glory of the Father and the glory of the Holy Angels. See, we have a decision to make. Being a disciple, as far as I'm concerned, is not an option. It's just a matter of how do I do it? Show me how to do it. And I believe that's the heart of most of you tonight. And if you gave me honest feedback, we're going to do everything we can to help that happen in our church. And it will be a great blessing to many of us. Heavenly Father, I want to ask you right now, now to do by the Holy Spirit what only you can do and that is to bring